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Book Review: Dot & Ralfie: A Novel, by Amy Hoffman
By Terri Schlihenmeyer
The Bookworm Sez
Dorothy “Dot” Greenbaum and Rafaela “Ralfie” Santopietro have been together for thirty years, but as they age, their stable lives begin to show cracks. Rife with Hoffman’s characteristic wit, Dot & Ralfie takes a hard, sometimes painful look at LGBTQ+ elder care and the unique struggles that come with aging outside of heteronormative structures. Can they get through it all and stay together? (Amazon)
“Dot & Ralfie: A Novel” by Amy Hoffman
c.2022, University of Wisconsin Press $16.95 147 pagesThere is one alternative to growing older.
Never mind, though, it’s not on your radar. You’re more focused these days on not groaning when you get up each morning, and keeping your joints oiled enough to work. Years don’t really mean much when you’ve got places to go and people to see before that alternative happens but in the new novel “Dot & Ralfie” by Amy Hoffman, keep one eye on that calendar…
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DIY Day: Vinegar and Dawn for Stubborn Bathtub Cleaning
Welcome to DIY Day at LGBTSr, a weekly feature about doing things ourselves – in the home, outside, wherever a project needs completing.
We have a well at our house in the New Jersey woods, and that means water with a lot of minerals in it. This can make keeping a clean bathtub a challenge: iron and other minerals quickly stain the porcelain. While I’ve learned to live with the realities of a house in the country, there are plenty of ways to make cleaning easier, whether it’s in a rural home or a city apartment.
Today I’m sharing a video from Jubara’s Cleaning Motivation YouTube channel on using vinegar and Dawn dish washing liquid to get stubborn stains out of a bathtub. It’s also good for the shower walls and the chrome.
Hot vinegar and Dawn dish soap – a miracle diy bathroom cleaner? How to get the yellow out of a bathtub.
For some more cleaning motivation check out my other playlist.
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Steve Hayes’ Tired Old Queen at the Movies: Joan Crawford in ‘Possessed’ (1947)
Joan Crawford tackles what she once described as the most difficult role of her career as a woman on the brink of madness in Curtis Bernhardt’s noir classic POSSESSED (1947). Helping her to earn her second Oscar nomination are Van Heflin, Raymond Massey and Geraldine Brooks. It’s producer Jerry Wald (MILDRED PIERCE and HUMORESQUE) and Warner Brothers at their melodramatic best.
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On Dreamshaping: When Staying the Course Means Hitting the Iceberg
Mark McNease
How many times have we kept doing something because we were convinced it would have the result we wanted if we just kept doing it? We stayed the course despite possible detours or course corrections because it felt safer and more familiar to trudge ahead, even though the ground we walked on got softer and muddier and harder to free ourselves from.
Jobs are a good example of this. Relationships, too. We plow ahead, ignoring warnings and our own deep understanding that this work or this person is not helping us live the life we want. It doesn’t have to be a partner, either. It can be a friend or family member whose world view is so at odds with ours that we’re better off wishing them well in our hearts and putting them out of our lives.
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Savvy Senior: How Medicare Covers Alzheimer’s Disease
Dear Savvy Senior,
What exactly does Medicare cover when it comes to Alzheimer’s disease? My husband was recently diagnosed with early-stage Alzheimer’s, and we would like to find out what’s covered and what isn’t.
Planning Ahead
Dear Planning,
I’m very sorry to hear about your husband’s diagnosis, but you’ll be happy to know that most medical costs to treat beneficiaries with Alzheimer’s disease are covered by Medicare. Unfortunately, long-term custodial care costs that most patients eventually need are not. Here’s a breakdown of what Medicare does and doesn’t cover when it comes to Alzheimer’s disease, along with some tips that can help you plan ahead.
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One Thing or Another: Brave New Retirement
By Mark McNease
It’s always One Thing or Another… a lighthearted look at aging, life, and the absurdities of it all.
“What day is it?”
It took me very little time after retiring from full-time work to ask this question, common among the post-job legions. After spending years with a life organized around a work schedule, one of the first things you may notice when the schedule is gone is that you’re uncertain if it’s Monday, Sunday, or some other day of the week you used to spend punching a time clock of one kind or another. For myself, I’d invested the previous five years staffing a deli counter at a grocery story, Thursday through Sunday. I’d called it my semi-retirement job, since I only had to put in thirty-two hours a week in exchange for benefits. The main reason was to provide health insurance for myself and my husband, and I’d promised myself that as soon as he was on Medicare, I was out of there. And I was!
It’s early days for me in this less restricted life. I can go to weekend festivals again. When we take our two-night getaways, they don’t have to be early in the week, when the hotel rates are cheaper but most of the restaurants are closed. I’d enjoyed that for a long time, but now we can book a room somewhere for whatever nights we want to be there, and it’s almost an overdose of freedom.
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The Weekly Readlines May 6
The Weekly Readlines (rhymes with headlines!) offers news you can use every week. You can view the archives here.
Quote for the Week: “We had a horrible plague, followed by two years of Covid.” – President Biden at the White House Correspondents Dinner 
BIG CUP: THE WEEK’S TOP STORIES First the good news: New Jersey has banned plastic bags. Watermelon gummies are now available at a cannabis dispensary near you (NJ), and President Biden’s approval rating has ticked up 5 points since February.
The Supreme Court that insists it’s not political showed itself to be completely, frighteningly, political in a leaked draft opinion by cultural Neanderthal Samuel Alito. The Justice assures us his draconian reasoning for overturning Roe will not extend to other rights (like same-sex marriage). We know he lies, as surely as he and his extremist cadre lied to get on the court.
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Ronni Sanlo’s This Day in Lesbian Herstory (April 30 – May 6)
Ronni Sanlo’s This Day in Lesbian Herstory makes the past ever-present with daily rundowns of historic events and people.
Ronni Sanlo
THIS DAY in LESBIAN HERSTORY -
Cover Reveal: Open Secrets: A Maggie Dahl Mystery
I hope to be finished soon with the loooooong awaited sequel to Black Cat White Paws: A Maggie Dahl Mystery.
In the upcoming Open Secrets, local author Shanna Delaney, who first appeared briefly in Black Cat White Paws, becomes the center of a murder mystery. Shanna has written a follow up to her successful first collection of essays about life in a Delaware River town, and this time she’s rumored to be naming names. Not everyone whose secrets she could reveal wants them made public, and someone may be willing to kill to stop her.
Meanwhile, a year after her husband’s sudden death, Maggie finds herself on a date with a man who just may be the one to lead her back to a life away from the grief she’s known. Can she love again? And more importantly, will she?
Find out in Open Secrets, releasing fall, 2022.
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An App for That: Easy Anytime Parking with ‘Park Mobile’
An App for That is a regular feature at LGBTSr highlighting useful apps and technology tips for our readers.
We were walking down the street recently and my husband, who only pays for parking if there is no other option, noticed how many parking meters had no time on them, yet cars were parked beside them. Lots of cars, up and down both sides of the street. We checked the posted signs, and sure enough, they were all supposed to pay. Yet we had walked several blocks to evade the meters. What was going on?
We asked a server at the restaurant we went to, and she said, “Oh, they’re probably using Park Mobile. It’s a parking app.”
I don’t know why it had never occurred to me to get a parking app, but considering how many times I’ve wanted to park closer to our destination but had no quarters for a meter (the town in question still uses coin-fed meters), you’d think I would have gotten a clue much sooner. Which brings us to Park Mobile, one of the most popular parking apps available. Check out the features and see if it’s for you. It makes parking a breeze, and it’s as available as your nearest smartphone.
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The Twist Podcast #192: Decomposing Democracy, Praise for Retirement, and Our Favorite American Carnage Memes
Join co-hosts Mark McNease and Rick Rose as we process the leaked Supreme Court decision clarifying the majority’s radical plans, offer some thoughts on the joys of retirement, and consider our decomposing democracy.
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Ask Your Uncle: Do 10,000 Steps a Day Really Make a Difference for Your Health?
Welcome to Ask Your Uncle, a regular feature at LGBTSr.com answering questions big and small. Have something to ask your uncle? Email us at Uncle@LGBTSr.com.
Q: Everyone seems to be counting their steps these days, with the general consensus being a minimum of 10,000 per day to maintain basic step-health. Where does that come from, and is 10,000 steps really a magic number?
A: Uncle sees step counters everywhere and wonders the same thing. Why do so many people consider 10,000 steps to be a basic daily requirement? What are they basing this belief on?