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Everywhere it’s legal: couple weds in Canada and every state they can
While those of us in New York wait sort-of breathlessly for marriage equality (I’m expecting it not to happen, that way I can be shocked if it does), one couple has simply gone to every state where they can marry or be civilly united and done it, as well as to Canada. I didn’t know you could have multiple marriage licenses. I suspect that’s not something any straight couple has ever thought of doing, given the one-size-fits-all reality of opposite-sex marriage.
From Out:
Paul David Wadler and Rick Brown have been married or received a civil union in Canada and every U.S. state where the ceremony is legal — and have pledged to continue their nuptials wherever else it becomes possible. With New York set to make history as the biggest state to legalize gay marriage, a trip to the East Coast might be in the couple’s future.
Continue reading
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Mark's Cafe Moi: The thrill of unsubscribing
Backstory: Once upon a time I had a BlackBerry. I didn’t know any better, so I thought it was the best thing ever. I used it for email, which I rarely got at the time, and the occasional on-the-run blog posting.
I kept seeing ads for the iPhone, which, as a natural contrarian, I refused to buy. There was just something herdish about it, so I demurred. Then I saw ads for a new BlackBerry, but it was an exclusive with AT&T. I have Verizon and am not one to jump ship. Plus Verizon’s the only carrier that works really well for me in the New Jersey countryside where we have a house and go on the weekends. I stopped in to the Verizon store just to see when they might be coming out with a version. The answer was “next year” if at all. I’m not a patient man, so I started looking at other devices, and discovered the Droid 2.
It was love at first tweet. Considering that I seldom use my cell phone as a phone, the Droid’s internet and applications ability swept me off my fingers. I’ve been devoted ever since.
Now . . . I set my Droid to make a little spaceship noise whenever I got a new item, whether a text message or an email. I have a lot of Google alerts coming in so I can stay on top of the news and what’s out there to blog about. I discovered that the incessant chirping was getting on my nerves, and that a lot of it is junk email. Which brings me to all those annoying subscriptions. Every time we provide our email to Office Depot or Staples or Lighting Direct or Amazon, which is essentially every time we order anything online, we end up in their data mine. And data mines are made for data miners. Suddenly I was getting emails about all kinds of things, and it was not only cluttering my various inboxes, but pissing me off.
So the last few days I have been unsubscribing. It never seems to end, but it feels wonderful, like washing grime off me in a luxurious shower. Little bugs, that’s how all these subscriptions feel, like tiny little bugs on my legs and now that I’m taking time to pick them off I’m feeling cleaner and freer. I will no longer provide my email unless I absolutely have to, and the first time I get an email from them offering me deals on things I’ll never purchase, I’ll be sure to scroll immediately to the bottom and get rid of them as fast as I got them.]]> -
23 House Republicans continue DADT mischief
Day dreamin’ and I’m thinkin’ of you . . . Determined not to let history roll over them without a peep, 23 House Republicans have continued their futile shenanigans to halt the repeal of DADT, led by hottie-in-a-bad-way Duncan Hunter. The man’s not right in the head, as my mother would say. From the Washington Blade: A group of 23 Republican members of the U.S. House wrote President Obama on Thursday asking him to hold off on certification of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” repeal until Congress can review the Defense Department’s policy changes that would lead to open service. “Given the necessity for congressional review, which has been limited to this point, we respectfully request that you refrain from transmitting certification until Congress has had sufficient time to review pending legislative matters of policy and law,” the letter states. Leading the group of U.S. House members who signed the letter is Rep. Duncan Hunter (R-Calif.), who amended pending defense budget legislation to expand the certification requirement needed for “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” repeal and potentially disrupt the implementation of open service. Others among the 23 signers of the letter are Rep. Joe Wilson (R-S.C.), chair of the House Armed Services personnel subcommittee, as well as Reps. Steven Palazzo (R-Miss.), W. Todd Akin (R-Mo.) and Vicky Hartzler (R-Mo.). Under the repeal law signed in December, “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” won’t be off the books until the president, the defense secretary and the chair of the Joint Chiefs of Staff certify the U.S. military is ready for open service. Training has been underway in the armed forces since February to prepare the military for “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” repeal. Pentagon officials have testified that certification for “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” repeal could happen in mid-summer. Defense Secretary Robert Gates has said he’s open to issuing certification this month before his retirement if the service chiefs thinks moving forward is appropriate.
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UN Human Rights Council approves resolution against anti-LGBT violence
I wasn’t sure I’d see the day, given the prevalence and acceptance of anti-LGBT violence in so many other countries.
From the AP:
GENEVA (AP) — The U.N.’s main human rights forum has condemned for the first time discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation.
The 47-member Human Rights Council voted 23 in favor and 19 against Friday, with 3 abstentions, for the resolution put forward by South Africa.
It establishes a panel to review discrimination of gays and lesbians around the world.]]> -
James Baldwin’s ‘Giovanni’s Room’ named #1 LGBT book by fellow authors
Asked to name the top 5 LGBT books of all time, a group of LGBT authors listed James Baldwin’s ‘Giovanni’s Room’ at the top of the list.
From the Good Men Project: . . . What’s the best gay book ever written? The work that appears on the most lists is James Baldwin’s Giovanni’s Room, which is set in Paris’ gay subculture in the middle of the 20th century and which writer Alexander Chee selected as one of his five titles. “It’s a searing, perfect novel,” he explained, “with few if any rivals for the way it brings us into the mind of a closeted young man fighting both to love and not to love his one great love, and the cost of this battle within him.” Other writers with books nominated multiple times include Jean Genet, Andrew Holleran, Alan Hollinghurst, Christopher Isherwood, Anne Carson, Herman Melville, Alice Walker, Virginia Woolf, Edmund White, Alison Bechdel, J.R. Ackerley, and Tony Kushner. Though author Michael Cunningham didn’t include Kushner’s play Angels in America among his five titles, he urged me to give it its due. “Although it is not prose or poetry, I can’t quite imagine a roundup of gay and lesbian literature that didn’t include it,” he wrote. “Angels in America is, to me, probably the seminal work to date about gay life (and so much of un-gay life at the same time).”
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LGBT car club to support veterans in Denver’s Pride parade
From Examiner.com: One of the great things about Denver, Colo. is the diversity you will find here. You will find various types of people with interest in various types of … oh, say, cars (this is the Classic Car Examiner page after all!). Part of being a diverse city is supporting others and one of most fun summer examples of that is the PrideFest parade that cruises down Colfax Avenue every June. This year the parade is special for two reasons: 1) It is Father’s Day, 2) The Center and parade sponsors are honoring veterans in this year’s parade. As part of that the Sunday Afternoon Car Klub, the Lambda Club International Denver Region Chapter, is driving the veterans in their wide and diverse array of classic and modern cars. If you haven’t heard of the Sunday Afternoon Car Klub then hold onto your hats because more information about the parade and the club are coming your way. The Sunday Afternoon Car Klub, affectionately referred to as S.A.C.K., has been a part of the Denver LGBT community for decades and provides a fun and enjoyable atmosphere for LGBT individuals and supports (yes, that means you don’t have to identify as one of the letters in LGBT — Lesbian, Gay, Bi, Transgendered) to enjoy everything about the automotive hobby.
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Column: AIDS – 30 years into a 'treatable disease'
By David Webb – The Rare Reporter
Three decades into the HIV/AIDS epidemic the future has never looked as promising for some who are infected with the virus and as bleak for others who will likely find themselves on the more unfortunate side of the spectrum of circumstances in the next decade.
For older LGBT people, the threat of contracting a new HIV infection could not be more frightening in terms of the dire consequences related to health and aging and the cost and availability of medical care.
Treatments for HIV infections have radically evolved since the early days when the side effects of medications such as AZT prolonged the lives of some HIV-infected individuals but often made them so sick they didn’t really care whether they lived or died. I witnessed several people choosing not to take the medications in earlier years because of how ill the side effects such as nausea and pain made them.
Now, HIV-infected people often appear to be living life as fully, if not more fully, than many HIV-negative people, thanks to the development of anti-retroviral drugs in the 1990s. Although their healthy appearances belie the massive, complicated regimens of multiple, often-changing medications to sustain them, there is no doubt HIV-infected people are living longer and feeling better.
Ongoing research by scientists around the world gives hope to the possibility there will someday be a vaccine to protect against HIV and possibly even eradicate it after infection. Just recently, it was reported that a man suffering from both leukemia and HIV who received a bone marrow stem cell transplant in Germany in 2007 is now HIV-negative. His bone marrow transplant reportedly came from a donor who was immune to HIV, an immunity that some scientists believe exists in about 1 percent of the Caucasian population.
The downside of all this is the enormous cost of HIV treatments when they eventually become available to the public. The bone marrow transplant treatment is incredibly painful, dangerous and expensive so its widespread use is unlikely.
Billions are already being spent on the delivery of anti-HIV drug cocktails, and those costs are expected to spiral in the next decade to astronomical amounts. At the same time, all of the major countries in the world are struggling to remain solvent during the worst financial crisis of more than a half-century. Regardless of what medical treatments become available, the majority of people may not be able to afford them. Millions of people in the U.S. are unemployed and uninsured for health problems they face. The states and the federal government have long provided health care and other resources for HIV/AIDS patients, but crashing budgets are already placing limits on those programs. And it’s only going to get worse as governments struggle to make ends meet. Insurance premiums are rising so quickly in tandem with the rising cost of health care that many companies are struggling to provide benefits for employees. A decade ago, it was common for companies to pay for 100 percent of employees’ health insurance policies, but now it is more common for employers to require 20 percent payments of premiums by employees. In addition to government cuts, the amounts of money HIV service organizations have been able to raise from the charitable public is almost certainly going to decrease as well. People just don’t have as much income to share with less fortunate people. For older Americans looking to retire and anticipating the end of their job-afforded health insurance, the availability of medical care through the federal Medicare program is going to be more problematic, as it will be for younger people contracting new HIV infections. And even if an older American has abundant financial resources to access whatever medical care is available, the truth is that the drug cocktails that have prolonged the lives of younger people just don’t work as well for anyone over 50, according to scientific studies. It’s hard to believe that the 30th anniversary of the HIV epidemic observed this month was accompanied by a United Nations report that 30 million people have died from the disease, and that 7,000 new infections occur globally every day. What’s more, a Centers for Disease Control and Prevention study was released earlier in the month reporting that LGBT students are more likely than heterosexual classmates to engage in risky behavior like alcohol and drug use, which presumably could lead to unprotected sexual activity. In the United States, it is estimated that 40,000 new infections occur every year, many times to people who are unaware they have been infected. So three decades into the HIV epidemic, we find ourselves pretty much where we were in the beginning back in 1981 when we realized it was likely a blood-borne, sexually-transmitted disease in most cases. No matter how rich someone is or how old they are, an HIV infection is unaffordable in every way imaginable. Prevention of an infection is still the best answer for everyone.]]> -
Rainbow Mountain gets new owners
If you’re a regular reader of MadeMark.net, you know one of my favorite travel spots is the fabulous Rainbow Mountain in the Poconos. Frank and I are headed there for another long weekend at the end of July. (See one of my videos on it here, and a posting here.)
Long time owner Angelo greeted us each time and gave us the key to room 102 – a special request from me because it has a painting above the bed that my mother had in her piano teaching room (a woman in a red dress sitting at a black grand piano). I discovered last week when I was following up on our plans that there are new owners. I don’t know if I’ve met Rich and Ray there, but they’ve bought the place and have been going there since 1985. I’m looking forward to saying hello in late July.]]> -
Boston LGBT seniors featured in Google "It Gets Better" commercial
By now you’ve probably seen the Google commercial for its Chrome browser that features the “Its Gets Better Project,” started by Dan Savage and his partner Terry to combat bullying. I was an early contributor, and since then it’s become quite a phenomenon.
Among those featured in the Google ad are two men from a group of Boston LGBT seniors.
From Bay Windows/Golden Rainbow Times:
Google launched a ground-breaking ad about gay suicides on primetime television during FOX TV’s “Glee” last month. The commercial for Google Chrome highlights the social movement that grew out of Dan Savage’s “It Gets Better” video on YouTube. The ninety-second spot beautifully captures the surge of emotions that came with the wave of suicides by gay youth last fall. Building in intensity, the commercial highlights how Savage’s video inspired thousands of people all over the world to put out their messages to gay youth urging them to hold on because “it gets better.” Since the “It Gets Better” project launched countless celebrities, athletes, politicians and artists added their own video messages including President Obama, Hilary Clinton, Lady Gaga and cast members from “Jersey Shore.”
Bob Linscott, Assistant Director of The LGBT Aging Project in Boston was touched by this movement but feared that there was an absence of gay elders in the videos. “The one generation that can truly attest that it does get better wasn’t represented,” Linscott said, “Gay elders faced seemingly insurmountable discrimination and harassment decades ago and thankfully survived. Those stories needed to be included in this project too.” So Linscott took the matter into his own hands and shot and edited his own video “It Gets Better: Wisdom From Our Gay Elders,” which he added to the thousands of videos uploaded on YouTube. The video features poignant and funny stories from a number of Boston area LGBT seniors, two of whom speak about times they attempted suicide.
In March the LGBT Aging Project was contacted by an agency working with Google on the “It Gets Better” commercial. They had seen Linscott’s video and wanted to use it in for the project. Linscott and Lisa Krinksy, LGBT Aging Project’s Director had to sign a non-disclosure agreement and were not able to let anyone know about the commercial until it aired on FOX TV. The commercial will now run at various times on multiple networks and it can be viewed online.
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Mark's Cafe Moi: Some afterthoughts on cruising (the ship kind)
Note the new name for my blog here at lgbtSr – Mark’s Cafe Moi. It’s got just a little more pizzazz than ‘Mark’s Blog.’
We returned Monday from our third cruise. Or maybe I should say my third cruise. Frank has been on many more.
Cruising for me was like the thought of visiting Mexico – I wouldn’t have done it had I not done it! I lived in LA for 12 years and had no interest in going to Mexico, but many years later when I was working at this job in Manhattan I went to Mexico City for a conference and absolutely loved it. Likewise with cruising, it’s not something I would have ever done when I was single, but Frank introduced me to it and it’s become one of my favorite ways to vacation.
I noticed yesterday, after two days back, that it still felt as if the ground beneath me was swaying. I hadn’t noticed it on the ship – it’s a constant rocking that becomes an under-the-surface sensation. It wasn’t until I was at my desk late Monday that I noticed that sense of rocking back and forth, as if my blood had become used to that slow steady sloshing. It’s going away now, but it was very pleasant while it lasted.
I love being in the middle of the ocean. A water love all my life (though I’m not into swimming pools, I just love vast expanses of water, rivers and lakes), there is something deeply mystical about standing on a cabin balcony and seeing that you are surrounded by such an endless expanse of ocean that were you to slide beneath it, ship and all, you would be nothing more than a drop falling into a sea. You would vanish, just like that, and the ocean would roll over you as if you had never been there.
Neither one of us was willing to pay exorbitant roaming charges, so the phones, Blackberries, Droids were kept off the entire trip. Quite a revelation after a couple days of not checking email or updating any statuses. I paid for a block of wifi minutes so I could do a little blog posting, but it was more trouble that it was worth so that was kept to a minimum. I think the next time I might even leave my camera home and just experience the entire trip without disappearing into a camera lens. And you can meet some very wonderful people. Some dull ones, too, some aloof ones, such as the young couple sitting next to us for the 6 pm dinner setting. As luck had it, we were each at a table for two, not all at a table for four, so their indifference to us every night was something we could dismiss. Contrasted to the number of lovely people we met at lunch when we had shared seating in another dining room. Straight couples, one with a young teenage son, who enjoyed our company as much as we enjoyed theirs. And one gay couple we met at the LGBT gathering. There were many more gay people on the ship, but I can’t say they were friendly because we didn’t speak. I love cruising. I want to do one a year now, and take the next trip somewhere other than a Caribbean island. Nova Scotia sounds nice . . .
You can see all of my personal blogging at MadeMark.net.]]> -
Rick's Travelicious: Gastronomical delights on Wisconsin’s 94: East to West
Editor’s note: I know one of the photos is sideways; it refuses to rotate! Just turn your head a bit . . . Mark From Frozen Custard in Milwaukee to Spicy Cheese Bread in Madison – Gastronomical Delights on Wisconsin’s 94: East to West You can easily eat your way through Wisconsin. Beer and cheese provide the obvious ways of doing so yet there are many other variations of eating and drinking derived from the state’s European heritage that will surely satisfy any visitor. Last Saturday I found myself enjoying the Dairy State’s two largest cities and what I suggest are their best culinary offerings! You can do the same by traveling East to West along Interstate 94. My journey of expanded waistline began in Milwaukee with a beer sampler with my friends Fuji and Carol. (Oh my, I pray my trainer Cody in Shreveport doesn’t find this blog!) There is nothing more refreshing than catching up with a couple of my many interesting friends and the latest brews at the newer St. Francis Brewery near Mitchell Field, the city’s international airport, and at my all-time favorite Milwaukee Ale House wonderfully located on the Milwaukee River. Fuji is an incredible artist who I journeyed to Cuba with years ago on a visual artist exchange (she represented calligraphy, I represented TV arts) and Carol was my assistant for years and is American Indian and has been active with Indian Summer for years (North America’s largest gathering of Indian heritage, held every September (this year the 9-10-11…GO!) at Summerfest Grounds in the “Brew City”). Most ale houses offer samplers of 6-8 beers for less than a buck a piece and have a wide menu of foods to accommodate all palates.
My dear, dear friend Noni (my intern from years ago whose wedding I attended in Karachi Pakistan many years ago as well) then picked me up to head West on 94 to the most amazing gathering of tastes you will find anywhere in the world, I promise! The Madison Farmers Market, officially the Dane County Farmers Market on the Square is located all around the square of the state capitol and now spills out to the side streets including the renowned State Street which will take you to the University of Madison (where, by the way, you can enjoy more beer at Der Rathskeller in the wonderfully creepy and dark Wisconsin Union and homemade ice cream created by ag students there at Babock Hall where my suggestion without question is orange custard with chocolate chips). The Market’s offerings change with the season, so this time of year, we enjoyed sampling and purchasing green onions, white and red radishes, mushrooms of all colors, shapes and sizes, tender asparagus, incredible organic tomatoes of various kinds, popcorn, fresh spinach and lettuces from bitter to sweet. Of course, we stopped along the way to taste cheese curds made and brought in that very morning and the famous Stella Bakery’s spicy cheese bread bread baked moments before being sold, served hot and steamy! Sign of the times or perhaps better health, but the amount of cheese is disappointingly far less than I remember. The Market unfolds under the cover of Wisconsin’s stoic capitol building, the only state capitol to be designed by the same man who did the US Capitol and only inches shorter in size. Of course, being in Madison during Walker’s reign proved interesting. The usual political and social agendas were represented amidst the market vendors including PFLAG (an organization that certainly has bettered many of our lives…I know mine for sure…having grown up in small town Northern Wisconsin!). But this time, countless petitions were available for signature from recall to repent! Ah, I love the activism in liberal college towns…and it doesn’t get better than in Madison, Wisconsin 2011! Along the square are great restaurants like my personal favorite for fish, the Blue Marlin and cool theatres (both film and live) which consistently feature art we LGBT appreciate…no agenda, often, just good story! The Bartell Theatre had just closed a production by the Proud Theatre. When in Madison, you will want to take in a show at the glorious olden golden theatre, the Orpheum, which is one of the venues of the fabulous springtime Wisconsin Film Festival. Returning on 94 to the shores of Lake Michigan, Noni dropped me off to my car which I conveniently left at Kopp’s Frozen Custard on 76th Street (one of three Kopp’s locations). I picked up a pint (or two!) of the flavor of the day…peach melba…and headed out to visit my longtime friend Shirley who celebrates 82 this year! It is our tradition to enjoy custard and pour over Kopp’s Flavor Forecast, printed out each month to make planning easier for custard freaks like us. Some flavors we LOVE; others, not so much. And there is usually one new creation that creates a conversation of curiosity. This month’s concoction of concern: Pancakes and Syrup custard. Would you try it? Five pounds heavier, I headed back to downtown for more beer samplings with friends and a run along the beautiful county parks that dot the shoreline of one of the five greatest lakes ever which are overseen by my incredibly gifted friend Sue Black who formerly ran the State Parks in Wisconsin . . . my favorite being Bradford Beach! Okay, I did sneak in one stop on 27th Street for a scoop (or two!) at Leon’s Frozen Custard, which boasts the “world’s finest custard,” is open til midnight and was the inspiration for Al’s Diner on Happy Days. You gotta love Wisconsin….such a flavorful state! Happy to call it my homeland. Before heading there, you must visit www.travelwisconsin.com and send a message to my good friend and former co-host of Discover Wisconsin, Stephanie Klett, Miss Wisconsin 1992 and now Secretary of Tourism for the state. I couldn’t be more proud!]]> -
Mark's Cafe Moi: Holding my breath – one vote short in New York
This is a short one and I hope it won’t prove bittersweet. I’ve kept my expectations very, very low in the marriage fight in New York. I’ve watched for over a decade as marriage equality proponents have struggled and protested and worked for the day we would achieve this, only to see it thwarted time and again. We didn’t have the votes in the Senate, plain and simple, and I wasn’t convinced we did this time.
Then I see that we’ve reached this amazing threshold: one vote short. The usual professional bigots are howling ever louder – Archbishop Dolan, the storefront preacher Ruben Diaz, the highly paid thugs from NOM – as we come so very close to something so very simple – the right of Frank and I to go downtown and get married. No big deal, as everyone will discover when it happens. A big deal to the couples who’ve been kept from it, certainly, but in the scheme of things, something everyone will look back on ten years from now and wonder what all that conflict, anger and prejudice was about.
You can see all of my personal blogging at MadeMark.net]]>
