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LGBT people over 50 increasing as percentage of the rainbow
]]>The number of lgbt people over 50 (the target audience for this site) is growing in proportion to the general population. And that number is expected to double by 2030. See link below.
Review: NYC summer movie retrospectives
By Steve Barnes Summer in New York means a lot of things to different people, but one thing it has always meant to me is a time for the kind of movie retrospectives that move old standbys from TV screens back into theaters. Film Forum has always been the biggest kid on the block when it comes to this sort of programming, its summer series devoted to science fiction, film noir and the raciest examples of pre-Code movie making having become a staple for many New York filmgoers. And they’re at it again this year with “Essential Pre-Code,” which is going on through August 11. This year’s model of their pre-Code smorgasbord features a tribute to wonderfully smarmy Warren William and a series of Tuesday triple bills. One highlight yet to come in the series is a double feature (July 31 and August 1) of “Call Her Savage,” in which an over-the-top Clara Bow makes what many think of as the first visit to a gay bar in any Hollywood film, and “Blonde Venus,” with Marlene Dietrich channeling King Kong a year before he hit the screen in a performance of the song “Hot Voodoo.” And one of those Tuesday triple bills (August 2) is nothing to sneeze at either: Ruth Chatteron as a powerful executive in “Female,” followed by two shots of Bette Davis in “Cabin in the Cotton” and “Ex-Lady.”
Kjoy's Life in the Sr Lane: What's the etiquette on that?
Kimberly “Kjoy” Ferren
Of all groups on this planet, I did not expect that the lgbt community, especially the gay boys, would need an etiquette book, but apparently we do – at least according to Steven Petrow, aka Mr. Gay & Lesbian Manners. He’s even written a book about it.
Who knew we didn’t know how to come out or ask for a date , or… wait a second, come to think of it, all of this was a near disaster when I came out. Okay. A “self help” book/site for young lgbt’s seems appropriate. But do the seasoned among us need this?
It got me thinking about all the faux pas I’ve committed over the years. God/esses, there have been some doozies! And who better to correct our mis-directions then a gay man. Sorry ladies, but overall unless you grew up in high society, we lesbians, especially when we first come out, are a bit lost on etiquette of lgbt-isms and the like. We tend to go right for the more radical side of our history: stop shaving, cut our hair militantly, no bras (don’t we regret that now that they’ve taken a downward slope!); live on brown rice, and eat from plates made on a potter’s wheel. Those were the days!
For me things were a bit different growing-up. I was lucky. I had a mom who appreciated manners and we traveled the world so we saw all sorts of social settings. The reason manners mattered was that my mom was literally raised a “holler” in the backwoods coal-mining area of southwest West Virginia. It was a true (unfortunately) ‘Coal Miner’s Daughter’ story (and worse). But my grandmother believed that just because they were poor country folk didn’t mean they had to be uncivilized. That attitude was forwarded on and she would take me, my brother, and some neighbor kids, out to dinner once a month to learn proper etiquette. That also meant I had to wear a dress! How she loved turning her tomboy into a girlie-girl whenever possible, so maybe these lessons had an ulterior motive. Anyway, there we’d go to the Camelot Smorgasbord all dressed up, and from the time we got to the car to the time we got home we were to do be gentle ladies and men. I wanted to wear my brother’s tie, but that was not going to happen (I sure did in college though!). At least I had cool shiny black patent-leather shoes.
Flash forward. When I came out at 19 I was blessed to find my lesbian mothers, Diane and Cece. What this meant was this couple took me under their wing and brought me into lgbt society. Actually they threw me into the fire, for Diane was an uber-lesbian in Los Angeles, a feminist wonder-woman fighting for women’s rights, lgbt rights, renter’s rights, hell everyone’s rights! Next thing I knew I was sitting at a table with then Mayor Tom Bradley, petrified someone would ask me ANY question. All I could think of was, ‘at least know which fork to use’ (thanks mom!). These two lovelies took me everywhere, brought me into the lgbt world amongst older (sexy!) womyn, and eventually I found my voice and my own radicalism through to proper adulthood.
They were so proud, and still are.
So I guess it’s not so crazy there is a website & book to help coming-outter’s (young & seasoned), or for straights to get it right about lgbt society (“straight talk”). We all need an etiquette connection in life, and though as a lesbian it pains me to say, outside of our moms, it’s usually a gay man.]]>
New poll finds dramatic shift toward marriage equality
Rings we got last year, now just waiting for a license.
The dying gasps of the anti-marriage forces can be heard loudly in New York, where a suit has already been filed to overturn the marriage equality law (it will certainly fail) and annul all the marriages taking place here. And now a new poll finds that attitudes are shifting rapidly in equality’s favor, even among seniors, a group that has been reliably opposed.
From Politico:
In a new polling memo intended to shape politicians’ decisions on the question of same-sex marriage, the top pollsters for Presidents George W. Bush and Barack Obama jointly argue that support for same-sex marriage is increasingly safe political ground and will in future years begin to “dominate” the political landscape.
The pollsters, Republican Jan van Lohuizen and Democrat Joel Benenson, argue in their memo, which can be read in full here, that support for same-sex marriage is increasing at an accelerating rate and that the shift is driven by a politically crucial group, independents. They are expected to unveil the memo, which was commissioned by the group Freedom to Marry and shared exclusively with POLITICO, at a press conference at the National Press Club today. ]]>
One-third of workers have access to partner benefits
dropping their domestic partnership coverage.
From the New York Times:
WASHINGTON — In the first comprehensive count of domestic partner benefits by a federal government agency, the Bureau of Labor Statistics found that about one-third of all workers had access to health care benefits for same-sex partners.
Bureau officials added two questions about domestic partner benefits for same-sex couples to the National Compensation Survey, a sample of 17,000 businesses and local governments, as a response to growing public interest in the topic, said Philip Doyle, assistant commissioner at the agency. The results were made public on Tuesday.
Thirty-three percent of state and local government employees had access to domestic partner health benefits for same-sex couples, the survey found, slightly higher than the 29 percent of employees in private companies.
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Interview: Robin Webb from A Brave New Day
By Rick Rose
Editor’s note: Recently, lgbtSr’s Rick Rose wrote here about his experience with HIV/AIDS 30 years on. Knowing that I was born in Mississippi, and himself living in Louisiana, Rick asked his former co-host from their days on WGEM in Quincy, IL and now on-air with Mississippi Public Broadcasting, Karen Brown, who to talk to about AIDS in the South. Karen introduced Rick to Robin Webb, an inspiration behind A Brave New Day, whose mission is to provide education and services and to advocate for people faced with life-challenging illnesses and conditions.
RR: There is power in the name of your organization. How did you choose A Brave New Day?
RW: Our organization is built on two complimentary principles, one, that personal empowerment is key to survival when faced with any life-threatening disease or condition and two, that every moment of every day must be fully embraced. For most of us in A Brave New Day’s peer survivor community, life and death literally tugs at you every morning you wake. It takes courage to take a deep breath, dust yourself off, dust the past off, endure the pains, the struggles, and choose life. I chose a Native American branding for A Brave New Day, using as our original logo a brave on a horse under the first light of day. He is essentially naked, surrendered. He is bowing to the sun with his spear at his side, clearly intent on conquering the day not so much with alpha force, rather in a state of humility and awe. For anyone who faces profound daily life challenges (don’t we all?), that image says it all.
RR: 30 years into AIDS, is it really a pandemic anymore? Do people still care? How do you keep education and awareness alive?
RW: We are still seeing 56,000 new infections in the US alone every single year. That number has not decreased for the last decade. American attention spans are short, particularly around HIV. Furthermore, people have always wanted to box HIV, to say “it’s just a gay thing” or “it’s just a black thing” or “it’s just this group that gets it or that group that gets it.” How far can one be from the truth! The virus knows no color or gender or sexual preference. We try very hard to continue speaking to the media, to continue offering community trainings and to advocate both on the local and national levels. Most of us who do federal advocacy, especially in DC, find ourselves fighting harder and harder to just hang on to medical and support services that already exist, which seem destined to be cut in this current political climate. This is discouraging, since we need ten times what exists now, to fight this pandemic. And oh yes, it’s still a pandemic. There are nearly 40 million people living with HIV and or AIDS on this planet today. There is a death from AIDS every 9 minutes.
RR: The gay man you were then (as HIV entered your world) vs. the gay man you are now (as a senior, technically)?
RW: Same man, different day, not so much different gay. Life goes on. You have a choice to say things like, oh I’ll never get intimate again, I despise my sexuality because of this virus, if only this if only that, but HIV is such profound experience. It teaches you who you are in no uncertain terms. It terrifies its host; it forces truth out of us. I have matured through this experience of aging with a lethal virus in my body and my psyche, so yes, externally speaking, I would have had a profoundly different life if HIV had never come knocking. Funny thing, though. Gay remains gay. Gay is gay is gay. Thank God it’s not a whim that just goes away if life circumstances go all wrong or if your partner dies, like mine did, or if a virus comes along. So if there is a deadly virus inside me, there is also “gay” my body and “gay” in my psyche as well, and for me that is a beautiful thing, nothing could be more life affirming.
RR: What is the ONE key difference between “AIDS in the South” and AIDS in the rest of the United States?
RW: The ONE key difference is – are — those TWO S’es with a line drawn through each one. $$, ching, ching. The South has been shortchanged, in terms of federal dollars and in many cases, nearly 10 to 1, for a long time and yet the epidemic has moved to the South. Putting it another way, the 10,000 PLWHA in Mississippi do no look the same in the eyes of the federal government as 10,000 PLWHA living in cities like Chicago or San Francisco. Housing assistance for people whose lives have been shattered, social support services, even access to life-saving medications, all components of comprehensive care are severely challenged in the South. Why is this? Because the feds just don’t like Southerners? No. Because since the beginning of the AIDS epidemic, before HIV really hit the South as hard as it is hit today, major urban areas built local advocacy into their infrastructure. They fought for their own, rightfully so. I know, I was there, I was a New Yorker during the 80s and 90s. We fought hard for every pill, every life-saving support service we got. We got empowered. We “ACT-ed UP.” The South just needs to build its own advocacy community. Southerners need to get louder about HIV/AIDS.
RR: It is 2011, when will the walls of ignorance, fear and discrimination come down?
RW: I can only answer that for myself. Those walls are already down. For society, probably never. History seems to send that message. However, it doesn’t mean we have to stop trying. Jesus said it all. Love one another. Buddha, Lao Tzu, Rumi, Muhammed, Mother Theresa, Ghandhi, Confucious, King, they all agree. We have to keep saying it, love one another. That’s the best we can do.
RR: As a LGBT Sr. who will you support for US President 2012?
RW: I’d like to see President Obama get re-elected. However, he must get tougher on HIV/AIDS. We felt such promise around HIV when he got elected, however, his track record ain’t so good. Yes, he inherited a national catastrophe and yes, he’s dealing with very stubborn, very dis-compassionate non-progressives. But we now have waiting lists for people needing life-saving medications, numbering over 8,500 Americans. Although most of the responsibility is that of individual states, and they haven’t done their job, the President has the power to step up to the plate and do something about making certain all Americans living with HIV have access to critical medications and stable housing. He loses my vote if he does nothing.
RR: Share with me about one individual we have lost who would have the most impact on your mission today, if s/he were still alive.
RW: There are so many. Hundreds, in fact. That is no exaggeration. My dear friend Trey Mangum died just last month. I am beside myself. The cause of his death was a heart attack, at
37 years old, just having received his PhD. in Social Work. For several years he was Executive Director at Grace House here in Jackson, a transitional living facility for persons living with HIV and/or AIDS, then Trey became Director of Housing at NO AIDS Task Force in New Orleans. I can already feel the impact of not having Trey around. I miss his mentorship and his support for our organization. However, when someone like Trey leaves the planet so suddenly, with so little explanation, his legacy and post-life presence seem even more intense, so I always have that to keep moving forward. Trey is one reason we keep on forging ahead. The hundreds of others I have known and lost, all of them equally significant, are also reasons to keep marching on.
RR: If AIDS ended tomorrow, what would your next life be?
RW: An avid hiker in Zion Park, Utah, Canyonlands, Grand Canyon, Glacier National Park, Bryce, Capitol Reef, Yellowstone and Yosemite. Oh wait, I already do that. A world traveler, 77 countries, all 7 continents. Oh wait, I just did that, still doing it. A fierce voice for social evolution and justice. Oops been there, still doing that. Write songs, work-out, appreciate every day. Hmm, already claimed. Ah well, I guess I wouldn’t change a thing. (Antarctica was cold.)]]>
Ft. Lauderdale makes play for gay honeymooners
Nice try. Ft. Lauderdale is hoping to attract same-sex wedded couples from New York looking for a honeymoon spot. I have mixed feelings, given Florida’s very anti-gay ways. We were visiting when the ads were running for Prop 2, to amend their state constitution prohibiting even civil unions. It passed. Still, a lot of us have friends and family there. Just hope you don’t get hospitalized and discover your marriage license is meaningless. Link below.
