Columns,  LGBTSR,  One Thing or Another

One Thing or Another: Found At Sea

By Mark McNease

It’s always One Thing or Another… a lighthearted look at aging, life, and the absurdities of it all.

Bodies of water hold a fascination for many people, as well as providing an indescribable comfort. I grew up in an Indiana town with two rivers, and I live just a mile from the magnificent Delaware flowing slowly between New Jersey and Pennsylvania. For me there has always been something about the movement of these vast waterways that felt like home, as if I really am a fish out of water longing to jump back in where I belong and swim away.

Oceans are like that, too, multiplied a million times. Oceans are adventures without end, journeys we can only take with our minds. Even if we sail out on them in boats or cruise ships, they’re so much bigger than we are that it makes us aware of our true size. Oceans and rivers, lakes, and even streams, cannot be argued with. They are the masters of us, not us of them, and their indifference is acute. An ocean doesn’t care what I think about world events or political developments, loves lost or triumphs enjoyed. Like its celestial counterpart spread across the night sky in a trillion tiny lights, it doesn’t even know I’m alive, reminding me that I needn’t be so consumed with own existence. I’m here. So what? I’ll twinkle like a star, leap like a fish in the shallows, break like a wave, and then I’ll go away. I think of that as peaceful, not sad.

A day at the beach gives me an opportunity to reflect quietly with a few hundred other people scattered around us. We have our blanket, our chairs and umbrella, and they have theirs. We notice them, they notice us, observing a serene gathering of strangers who, under other circumstances, may not be so kind to each other. Opinions, frustrations, divisions, ambitions, failures, and successes, all stop at the water’s edge. It’s as if we leave them behind in the car, unwilling and unable to be burdened with them for the next few hours. We want to sit or lie on the sand, listen to the sound of other humans and a few seagulls, and glance every now and then out to sea.

The ocean has no use for our rivalries. It comes toward us in waves and tides, and nothing we do can stop it. We know this. The ocean knows this. We will never be evenly matched, so we surrender for a day and enjoy the pleasures that come with being grains of sand on a beach with an infinite number of them. There is great freedom in being unimportant, in knowing we’ve come from the sea and will return there, someday, somehow. In our bathing suits, protected from a sun far greater than the oceans, we relax into nothingness, liberated by our own sheer smallness. Another great day at the shore.

Mark McNease is the author of ten novels, two short story collections and six produced plays. He was the co-creator of the Emmy and Telly winning children’s program Into the Outdoors. He currently lives in rural New Jersey with his husband and two cats. He can be found most days at MarkMcNease.com